Turns out, Adelaide has a lot of students. Combining Flinders, Adelaide Uni and UniSA there’s about 80,000. That’s a lotta learnin. Now because we’re such a cosy little city, we’ve all got fairly similar Uni culture whether we go to Uni on the East Side, the West Side, or Woop Woop (I think that’s where Flinders is?). There are a particular few kinds of people you find at these prestigious institutions no matter what degree you study at which University, and I’m sure we’ll all look back at our time at University fondly and wish they just wouldn’t.
The Ones Who Give No Shits
You don’t generally see these elusive enigmas around, also known as ‘The Nightcrawlers’, so it’s hard to describe them really. They’re known to make an appearance in the first week tutes so they can ascertain just how little work they need to do, and then at any compulsory attendance events later in the semester. For some reason they keep racking up a HECS debt despite not really paying attention to what it is they’re studying, possibly to maintain their Centrelink benefits and to fit in at The Austral. They generally wear trackies, or the utmost casual wear possible. They don’t carry a bag, because they have little notes or textbooks to speak of. On arrival to a test they’ll ask you what it’s on, and how much it’s worth.
The Ones That Are So Individual It Hurts
I don’t mean to target all of you arts students, but it’s almost scientifically proven that all of the students who most try to highlight their individuality and originality study a humanities degree. While the dress code for most students is pretty casual, the individuals will don their finest op-shop get up, or fair trade Ethiopian-made dress they got at the Oxfam shop. They congregate in large groups in the Hub or a similar communal area and get super intimate and passionate about whatever issue it is they’re protesting that week. They’ll express their personal views in class, and hang out at all the coolest coffee joints like Hey Jupiter, Hello Yes and Austin & Austin while playing Cards Against Humanity.
The Ones That Can’t Let Go Of Their Private School Upbringing.
The transition from school to University is quite a transition for everyone, despite the school you attended. However, there are some kids who were lucky enough to attend a private school in the Eastern Suburbs and can’t quite shake the feeling of prestige they’re used to. Popular degrees include Law, Commerce, Economics and Med – anything else is a complete waste of their time and their parents’ money. They wear Sass and Bide/Ralph Lauren and play footy or row or something, but no one really cares. They drive to Uni a lot of the time and have no qualms paying exorbitant prices for parking, just chuck it on Dad’s credit card, right? They’ll go to Uni Bar or equivalent just to say they did, but will end up laughing at how dingy it was later that night with their friends at Go Go Lady Boy.
University is competitive, of course. We are all generally studying to get a degree, that will get us a relatively good job, so we can make the money, and eventually pay for our children to experience the same joy. But then there are those people who are on level 18 of the effort game. Uni is like The Hunger Games, if they don’t contribute at least 10 times in a class they will most likely be killed. They start essays more than 5 days before it’s due, attend careers days and are on either extreme end of the students politics scale: part of the Marxist society leading protests against any government policy that disadvantages any Australian whatsoever, or attending schmoozy Young Liberals events. Either way, people generally try to ignore them while they aim for solid Credits.